Updated: Down t’my chins

Thank you kindly for the lovely comments: I am a happy girl again. That’s the thing with glum posts, I suppose – they’re the virtual equivalent of dolefully howling HOLLLD MEEEEE! And you did. Tenderly!

I am up to my chins in rubbish currently, and cannot indulge in my usual wordy pontification. I am tidying like a demon, and the heaps of crap outside my front door are getting even more trailer-parky. There is a washing machine, a TV, a frying pan, a bucket & spade, a borrowed hen drinker, a fondue set, a cuddly toy… didn’t she do well?! At this rate, Harry’s little friends will know just what to think, I fear.

I have to tell you about the website I’ve just discovered. It translates text into various dialects, and I am particularly entranced with Jive & Redneck. I shall leave you with A) a picture of Hairy Hubby, an hour after his return from the pub last night – you’ll have to imagine the snores –

and B) the above text translated into Jive. If I had more time, I would You Tube my attempts at pronunciation and kill you dead!

Dank ya’ kindly fo’ de lovely comments, dig dis: ah’ am some happy goat again. ‘S coo’, bro. Dat’s de doodad wid glum posts, ah’ suppose – dey’re da damn virtual equivalent uh dolefully howlin’ HOLLLD MEEEEE! Right on! And ya’ dun did. Tenderly! Right on! I’s gots’ta be down t’my chins in rubbish currently, and kinnot indulge in mah’ usual wo’dy pontificashun. ah’ am tidyin’ likes some demon, and da damn heaps uh crap outside mah’ front doo’ is gettin’ even mo’e trailer-parky. Slap mah fro! Dere be a wuzhin’ machine, some TV, some fryin’ pan, some bucket & spade, some bo’rowed hen drinker, some fondue set, some cuddly toy. Slap mah fro!.. dun didn’t she do well?! Right on! At dis rate, Harry’s little homeys gots’ta know plum whut t’dink, ah’ fear. Ah be baaad… I have t’tell ya’ about da damn website I’ve plum discovered. It translates text into various dialects, and ah’ am particularly entranced wid JIBE & Redneck. Ya’ know? Ah’ shall leave ya’ wid A) some picture uh Froy Hubby, an hour afta’ his return fum de pub last night, and B) de above text translated into JIBE. If ah’ had mo’e time ah’ would You’s Tube mah’ attempts at pronunciashun, and waste ya’ wasted! Right on!




The party is 2pm – 5pm! BASTARD weather!

0100 Partly cloudy 17°C SSW 14 mph   Excellent
0400 Partly cloudy 15°C S 12 mph   Excellent
0700 Sunny intervals 15°C SSW 10 mph 20 mph Good
1000 Sunny intervals 18°C SW 15 mph 34 mph Very Good
1300 Light Rain Shower 20°C SW 16 mph 36 mph Very Good
1600 Light Rain Shower 20°C SW 15 mph 30 mph Very Good
1900 Sunny intervals 20°C SW 13 mph 27 mph Very Good
Night Partly cloudy 14°C SSW 12 mph   Good

I haven’t started H’s birthday cake yet, and the living room carpet still looks like this

only minus the hairy hubby.

My mother has just turned up to help me tidy, but she has immediately started to tidy things that are already tidied! Give me strength…!


7 Responses

  1. Wow…my new favorite site

  2. Haven’t stopped laughin’ hyar. Thet is one right fine site. Figgerin’ of yo’ an’ thet unpredickable English weather fo’ th’ trimenjus birthday bash t’morry. Make sho’nuff yo’ wo’d up th’ official photographer t’take plenty of photos of yo’ an’ Harry t’mark th’ day. Eff’n yer still wo’ried about how yo’ look in them ax th’ official photographer t’make sho’nuff they take yo’ in close-up. Tell them yo’ doesn’t be hankerin’ t’see enny distrackin’ backgroun’s.

  3. Wettin’ mahse’f hyar!

  4. *Falls about laughing, especially at Froy Hubby*

    You do know it is utterly traditional and therefore IMPORTANT to the British soul to have garden parties in the rain? It’s, it’s like tea made in a tea-pot, and watching your brother play cricket while drinking luke-warm Pimms out of a plastic cup, and like being one of the secret society whose school fed them curry with raisins in, and like actually enjoying good long muddy walks. You are, by your very actions, upholding this island’s centuries-long tradition of bloody well enjoying being just a little bit dismal. So chin up, my dear.

    Also, your mother tidying up the bit you’ve just tidied – do they take mothers aside when their daughters hit sixteen and TRAIN them to do this? Like a Masonic Rite for the menopausal? Grrrrrrrrrrr.

  5. Oh man, that Jive talkin’ is funny shit! That’s great. It reminds me of this: http://failblog.org/2008/07/31/grammar-check-fail/

    I can’t believe your husband could fall asleep amidst all of that stuff, he looks so peaceful. I would have kicked him and then pretended I hadn’t.

  6. Thanks for showing me where to start on the “a little pregnant” blog. I am new to blogging and admittedly a dork.

  7. I’m dying to hear how it went. Did the rain hold off?

Comments are closed.

%d bloggers like this: