Bed Rest

at the ripe old gestation of 8 weeks, prescribed on the basis that the fat lady has not yet definitively sung. The area of endometrium that has, for reasons known only to itself, decided to fall off and haemorrhage badly (heparin and aspirin are not helping the oh-dear-God-so-much-blood situation) is situated below Turbo and not above. Turbo is still there, still struggling bravely to stay alive – albeit mysteriously shrunk 1.5mm overnight – and probably eyeing the immediately-adjacent-to-gestational-sac source of the bloody torrent with well-founded apprehension.

It would be unlike me to get things over with in a mere 24 hours; that is not usually how I fail at pregnancy. Not for me, the swift clean ending. I fear I must trespass on your spectacularly kind limb-holding a trifle longer. Little Turbo’s demise, if demise there be (and oh, how I am miserably expecting to let you down, Turbo. I am powerless to rescue you from this lethally faulty housing I have hopefully, naively, installed you in. How did I ever think I might avoid disaster this time?) will likely be a protracted affair.

I have, of course, been told to go straight back if the pain or bleeding gets worse, but my biggest immediate fear is miscarrying without warning at home, and having to take pregnancy sac – assuming I manage to save it from a watery and ignominious toilet grave – back to hospital for tests. Which has happened before.

Poor Turbo. Poor John. Poor Me.

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44 Responses

  1. Oh dear. Not quite at the stage of “oh I’m so sorry” yet though. All appendages crossed.

    I get the feeling bed rest is what they suggest if they can’t think of anything else.

  2. You poor poor girl. I am so sorry – how undeserving of this nightmare you are, how unfair it is. Oh, Ann – never a trespass. I am sending you, John and Turbo my agnostic prayers. I hope so much that this is not the end.

    xxxx

  3. I just don’t even know what to say, except to groan.

  4. Turbo is definitely a fighter – thats for sure. Holding whatever appendage is available…don’t mind my grip – I’m feeling kind of anxious. 🙂

  5. *that’s

  6. Oh very much poor all of you. Let us hope that fat lady keeps her trap shut. I am still cheering for Turbo, in fact, all of you.

  7. Indeed poor, poor HF Family. All of you. That Turbo is hanging on in there is good. I am keeping fingers firmly crossed.

    Probably impossible to do but try and ignore the overnight change in measurements – different scan machine, different operator, different angle all mean it probably means nothing or not very much. Even at the King of Scans’ joint I’ve had what felt like wildly different measurements on the same day.

    And as twangy says – its never a trespass. x

  8. Poor you all indeed.

    This is hard enough to read, let alone for you to live through. I hope Turbo keeps turboing.

  9. I am so sorry you are enduring this. Life owes you one. It owes you several. Turbo, hang in there.

  10. I hate that fucking fat lady.

    Hang in there, Turbo!

  11. As much as an anonymous internet stranger can, I have an attachment to my namelet, Turbo. Still have a fervent hope that s/he keeps turboising for another 30 weeks.

    Give me an appendage to hold, I’ll hold it.

  12. I don’t know what to say.
    *Pats foot, offers hugs*
    Different measurements probably don’t mean that much, I think. Also feel the need to say that you don’t have to take anything to the hospital if you’d rather not. They don’t need to know exact whereabouts. Do what is best for you.
    Hoping, utterly, that the bleeding settles, and Turbo hangs on.
    More hugs x

  13. Enthusiastically duct-taping mouth of fat lady.

  14. Oh…..

    I really, really am hoping for a good ending for you and Turbo. I’m sorry you have to go through this.

  15. *leaps into the fray to help May ProblemUterus subdue the Fat Lady*

    I haven’t stopped hoping, but Turbo is giving me an ulcer. Hang in there!

  16. Well, fat lady definitively taped then. Don’t know what to say other than hang in there and thank goodness Turbo is still in there, growing away (1.5mm is ultrasound operator error, don’t worry).

  17. Have been reading but at a loss on what to say. Sending all the Positive thoughts to you all I am able.

    Thinking about you and sending hugs

    Xx

  18. Couldn’t comment from work, so was sitting at my desk tearing my hair out and clicking ‘update’ every 37 seconds.

    Dear little Turbo, STAY. You’re not allowed to leave until you weigh at least 6-and-a-half pounds and have lovely working lungs and everything.

    As for the bleeding (oh, my dear. Oh, my darling girl. Poor you. Poor John) – I should imagine you’re on so many blood-thinners that the slightest damage to the tiniest arteriole would make like a fire-hose. At least, I am telling myself this to cheer myself up.

    *There not being any limbs left to hold, resorts to Hovering and Flapping*

  19. Hang in there, O brave one. (I mean you, but Turbo too….) Thinking of you.

  20. Also, TWO WEEKS until the next scan? TWO WEEKS? Are they on crack? Two weeks indeed. Bah.

  21. Still holding that appendage. And if you want me to do that in real life or to make deliveries to the bed-ridden, just shout!

    Much love xxx

  22. Since all of your limbs are being held at the moment, maybe I’ll go off and virtually do the laundry. And the dishes. Harry, do you need a cookie? Chocolate? Anne, John, any takers?

  23. Never commented before, but just wanted to say I’m crossing fingers and toes for you. I had similar issues with my last pregnancy – was on Lovenox shots, aspirin, progesterone, etc., and bled through the whole thing. Had a hematoma that got progressively bigger each time they scanned it, until it got to 14 cm, but the baby held on and was born @ 36 weeks healthy. I don’t think I fully relaxed until he was about 8 months old. So here’s hoping you have a great outcome, too, and that Turbo decides to stay put for another 7 months or so.

  24. Thank you, everyone. I feel very looked-after by you all.

    Rightly or wrongly, I have discontinued heparin and aspirin, and have just left a message shrieking for advice with former consultant, as the Prof is away. Injecting/ingesting blood thinners when one is already cramping and bleeding chunks seems highly counterintuitive. The blood loss this morning was terrifyingly large. Do not want to bleed out on our bathroom floor, I still haven’t cleaned it after the OHSS fainting debacle. (where do they hide circumflexes on iPhones?)

    • Crappy but not yet disaster so still going the positive route with great hope. I wondered about the wisdom of continuing the heparin particularly as it does seem contraindicated when you are bleeding so much. Let’s all hope logic prevails, Turbo stays put and that the frigging fat lady goes on a world tour before returning to herald Turbo’s perfect delivery in no less than 6 months time.

      xox

  25. *Brings tea in lieu of hand holding. Also biscuits. Difficult when one is also crossing everything in sight*

    Hoping for you.

  26. Fingers and toes crossed, but really – TWO WEEKS?!? Two DAYS is too long to wait for a follow up u/s! GAH. Stick, turbo, stick!

  27. hang on, turbie.

    will go on gripping whatever limbs i can reach from here.

    (two weeks is so, so long — but at least it’s not january 6th, which is how the dumb american first read it.)

  28. Poor you, indeed. What a rotten state of affairs, although Í am heartened by the fact that there is still some life, which means there is also hope. Bed rest and teeth gritting it is then.

    Sees perfectly logical to me to stop medications that enable free-flowing blood when you want to stop free-flowing blood, but I hope your shrieks get a prompt consult-y response.

    Hang in there. Do you have chocolate? You need chocolate. I wish I was near enough to make sure you were properly supplied!

  29. For what it’s worth, I think stopping the blood-thinners was the right thing to do for now.
    Hugs. Yes, more.

  30. Crossed everything that is possible to cross. Two weeks does seem like a *very* long wait though.

  31. Buggering hell. Can’t a girl catch a break? Jesus. I will be have you all in my thoughts and will be refreshing madly to keep an “eye” on you from 4000 miles away.

  32. Have turned violent shade of aqua due to breath holding of marathon proportions.

    And could someone please put the duct-taped obese female warbler onto an flying machine for delivery to the outer-reaches of the Antipodes? I am happy to supervise her incarceration for the next 30 odd weeks.

    Sending you all strength and love.

  33. As Father Ted did to Bishop Brennan, I have booted the positive thinking fairy in the arse (Lazy bitch needs to get moving)

  34. My words seem to have deserted me so I will just say, what everyone else said. Sending you lots of warm fuzzies and wish I could get you a cup of tea.

  35. I am going to believe that Turbo is fine. That Turbo is the Wonder Embryo who is unfazed by the blighting going on beneath it. That Turbo knows that your body, it just doesn’t play nicely with others inside, and that Turbo has decided to rise above it and show your body once and for all that no, it cannot get the best of absolutely everyone.

    I am going to believe that.

    I am here to loan you belief, chocolate, and further rousing clichéd statement if and when you need it.

  36. The number of people who’ve visited your site today must be huge, as I (and probably everyone else) keep coming back and checking to see how you are…
    Hoping no news is good news.

  37. oh dear. Fecking arse. Hang on lady. Just hang on in there. I am crossing, holding, licking, praying and generally throwing lucky rabbits feet at the universe for you.xxx

  38. Back with a fresh roll of duct tape.

    Xoxo

  39. Here from Mel’s Roundup…praying hard for you and Turbo.

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